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Taking your green wherever you can find it

It may not be in the hues they would prefer, but one Central West town still retains vestiges of its colourful nature. While cycling around the local streets, Michael Milston of Orange observed that despite the local lawns being parched and brown, the weeds in them are thriving, with the only flowers he is seeing being dandelions. Fellow Orange dweller Joan Brown confirms this, noting that “against all the odds lush green weeds still manage to grow in the cracks between the driveway pavers”.

Like the rest of us, Dave Horsfall of North Gosford has been dismayed by the magnitude of the animal losses due to the bushfires. However, seeing the reports from Gippsland in Victoria reminded him that “we haven’t seen Bruce the Giant Gippsland Earthworm for a while. How is he?” Perhaps if we’re very lucky Bruce’s friend Matthew Martin will let us know.

“I’ll take Janet Morrisey’s kebab shop gluten-free chooks (C8) and raise her the organic water advertised at a northern freeway servo,” wagers Paul Falconer of Thirroul. Having recently enjoyed “a free-range, antibiotic-free chicken that had been ‘raised on a vegetarian diet'”, Ian MacDonald of Newport is “now looking to see where I can get the carnivore chicken alternative.”

“Hear, hear Lynn Woodley,” cheers Tony Bayley of Mosman. “Impact (C8) used to imply a powerful collision. Now too much salt in the soup impacts the flavour.” David Swain of Glenhaven notes that the next step from impact is, of course, negative impact. “I can imagine the impact of a hammer on a nail, but I have difficulty in visualising a negative impact.”

Stephanie Edwards of Roseville thought that child labour had disappeared from first world countries in the nineteenth century. “So why is Lowes advertising workwear for children on TV?”

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